I remember a question my parents used to ask me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" My answers changed depending on what was going on around me. An experience that stood out to me was with my advanced mathematics teacher in high school. I remember asking him about a formula he had written on the blackboard. He didn't take kindly to it. I had the highest score during our first homework quiz, and he ridiculed me in front of the entire class. This experience shattered my confidence, and I eventually dropped the class.
On reflection, my teacher psychologically bullied me, and I lost faith in myself. Like me, you might have been told in subtle ways, "You will not make it. You are not good enough. You don't belong here. You don't have enough experience." You may have been overlooked for a promotion or someone took credit for your work. These experiences can weaken your resolve and tempt you to cut your dream down a size. You have a choice to make. You can believe your nay-sayers and throw in the towel, or you can choose not to listen to them and hold your head high. Thanks to a great support system, I was able to find myself again. I made a promise never to let other people's opinions become my facts.
Never let other people's opinions become your facts
Can you imagine what we would be missing today if the following people had listened to their critics and given up? Walt Disney was fired from the Kansas City Star in 1919 because, his editor said, he “lacked imagination and had no good ideas.” Oprah Winfrey was a news reporter and got fired because she couldn’t sever her emotions from her stories. Abraham Lincoln went to war as a Captain but came back as a much lower Private. He failed as a businessman, and he lost several runs for public office. JK Rowlings' "Harry Potter" novel was rejected 13 times until one publisher took a chance on her. Critics told Barrack Obama that he didn't have enough experience, and America was not ready for a black president.
As you can see, some of the leaders we admire today were not initially recognized. But, they all had a can-do attitude and believed the only limits that existed were the ones they placed on themselves.
Personally, many people ask me why and how I made the switch from having a Ph.D. in chemistry to being an author, organizational and leadership coach, trainer, and speaker. The why – I am following my passion. The how? It wasn't easy. It was a 10-year journey. I can't count the number of rejections I received. Some people thought I was having a career crisis. In the final phase of my career transition, I did two day-jobs for four months to make the switch. Someone pressed the golden buzzer, and I am grateful it has paid off. Do I miss my engineering arena? Yes. Do I have any regrets? No. I have learned no experience is wasted. My technical background has been invaluable in my toolbox.
“Even though there are days I wish I could change some things that happened in the past, there’s a reason the rearview mirror is so small and the windshield is so big - where you’re headed is much more important than what you’ve left behind.”...Anonymous
Pursuit is the evidence of desire. As you pursue your dreams, remember to take the following dares with you:
Dare to be you: Accept your individuality and embrace your originality. Not everyone is going to like you or what you have to offer. That is okay. Instead, focus your energy on discovering the people, places, and projects that bring out the star in you.
Dare to believe: Belief is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Dare to believe in yourself and your dreams. This starts with having an honest assessment of your strengths and capabilities. "You can be anything you want to be" holds when you are in your strengths zone. On the flip side, you are your own worst critic. Yes, you need to ignore that negative inner voice that prevents you from showing up.
You can only feature in a future you can picture. Dare to dream big.
Dare to be rejection proof: Go for what you want and not what you think you can get. The latter is about a fixed mindset – cut your coat down a size, while the former is about a growth mindset – create opportunities and possibilities. You know you are stepping out of your comfort zone when you start getting no's. Sometimes you win, and sometimes you learn.
Dare to bring others along: One is too small a number to achieve greatness. Big dreams require you to have a board of directors (friends, mentors, advisers) through life's journey. Oprah, Disney, Obama, Lincoln, Rowlings couldn't have done it alone. Like the Nigerian proverb says, "If you want to walk fast, walk alone. If you want to walk far, walk with a team."
Dare to do it afraid: As they say, half of success is showing up. Dare to do it afraid. You are stronger than you think. With the right attitude, you can reach your altitude. All it takes is one step at a time. Yes, you will fall at times, but get back up again. The bend of a road is not the end of the road. You don't want to live the rest of your life thinking "shoulda coulda woulda"
You are stronger than you think. Get back up and get in the arena. It is not over until you win!
You can't undo the past, but you can rewrite the future. The actions you take today will determine the possibilities you will create tomorrow. Like the sun that rises every day, rise up and give your dreams a fighting chance. Your best days are ahead of you. What are you waiting for? Dare!
As always, I would like to hear your thoughts and experiences.
#Leadership #Courage #Culture #Business #Growth #Mindset